Lucky

When I started this blog two and a half years ago, I thought it would just be a fun place to document my progress as a writer; somewhere to let loose all those thoughts and theories that arise during that long, wonderful, arduous, exhilarating process known as "writing a novel." You know, just another place to get the voices out of my head and onto the page.

I didn't know I would make such wonderful friends, and that has been the best surprise of all.

First Tia. We started reading each other's work, helping each other with query letters, consulting each other on decisions (I think the email thread in which I debated whether to enter the Golden Hearts lasted a week!). She's a great writer and a dedicated reader, and her insights never fail to blow me away. She sees things that I never thought of before, opens my eyes in ways I didn't think possible.

Then, when I was at the 2008 Pennwriters Conference, frequent commenter Eden asked me to write an article for Toasted Cheese about conferences. That opportunity, offered at such a tumultuous time in my writing life, bolstered my confidence--and going back to my old newspaper roots and writing in article format was incredibly fun. I must've done a decent job, because she's now reading Grim Light. Considering that she's an ABNA award semi-finalist (go read it! go review it!), I can't wait to hear her thoughts.

Lisa popped up in late 2008, offering to read Battle of the Hexes when I was considering self-publishing it on the Internet. She's a reader of Tia's, as well, and I think of her as our cheerleader. Unfailingly insightful and helpful, always enthusiastic, she pointed out aspects of my book that no one had noticed before. She's now read Grim Light--you can see her thoughts here--and as I go through her notes and apply her advice to the novel, I'm certain that we're making it a better book--together.

I met Steven on Absolute Write, early this year, after he found my blog and asked for some advice about starting his own. He's added his name to my reader list, and I've added mine to his. Considering his poetry, I'm eager to get started on his novel, A Birthday Suicide.

I don't even recall how Jen Hayley and I met. But I've been cheering on her progress, as she snagged an agent and is now, I believe, on submission, and I can't wait to see more success from her. Partly because it's so exciting, and partly because she keeps on posting teasers that make me desperate to read more, and I want to go to the bookstore and buy the darn things, but I can't because they're not there yet, and it's very frustrating, and it makes me write with excessive italics. I tell her to stop torturing me, but she keeps doing it. So maybe next Tuesaday I'll fight back with a little of my own...

So basically, I think you guys are so full of awesome, it must be bursting out of every pore. And I just wanted you to know that you're making the writing so much less lonely, and for that I thank you.

No April Fool's here, because it's the damn truth.*

*Argh. More italics. Darn you, Jen!

Looking Back

Listening to: The patrons of the awesome little cafe I frequent, out on the patio, on one of the last nice days of the year!

It's funny to look back, after you're finally done.

I really didn't think Freya (now tentatively titled Grim Light) ever had a chance. When I first started writing it in February, a few elements of the idea were different, but not markedly so. And I really didn't see where it could go. I remember asking TH, in the car one winter night, if he thought it was okay to just write something because I enjoyed it, even if I didn't see a future for it. Writing for writing's sake, essentially. He, of course, thought it was fine. He thinks everything I do is fine (grin). So I worked on it, and then I stopped and picked up something else...and then I picked it up again, and so on.

When I chose to focus on Grim Light (still getting used to that!) after I started my job in June--because I didn't really think working full-time and writing three or four different books all at once seemed like a good idea--I was very uncertain. My writing time was going to be severely reduced, so I wanted to be sure that whatever project I chose wouldn't be a waste of time. I honestly think it was a combination of my love for the book and other people's love for it that made me choose it, despite its inherent uncertainty.

So to finish it was a more fulfilling accomplishment than any other book I've written (this is four, she said sadly and triumphantly). After the initial rush wore off, I looked back to February, and how hopeless it all seemed. Heck, I looked back to this past Sunday, when it also seemed hopeless. And I truly couldn't believe it. Not that it had been hopeless--no, I remembered that feeling all too well--but that I'd done it. That I'd taken this idea that initially looked like a dead-ringer for a dead-end, and managed to find a way out. That I'd ever had enough faith, in those early days, to keep going, instead of abandoning it for one of my more promising ideas. That I hadn't had enough faith, all those times I did abandon it for a while, and had almost missed this chance. It seems like a minor miracle to me.

Sometimes, you have to find hope even when something seems impossible. Sometimes, you have to write just because you love your characters, whether you think they'll reach the end or not. Sometimes, you just have to turn off that voice of uncertainty and write for the sheer joy of it.

Sometimes, you just have to write.

I Can Die Happy Now.

I know I've been MIA lately, and I promise to be back with some nice, juicy blogging very soon...but in the meantime, the reason I could go to my grave happy if I should be stricken down right now:




It's all the way at the end, but it's a delicious trifecta of three things I love: Jon Stewart, Barack Obama, and...Primanti Brothers.

Beautiful.