*Headdesk* I just realized that, due to an omission in my record-keeping, I simultaneously queried two agents at the same agency. One I queried two months ago, via post, and haven't gotten a reply from. The second I queried just today--also via post, and the mailman probably picked the letter up half an hour ago.
Crap. Now I feel pretty damn stupid. That's the first mistake I've made since my very first query letter...which was sent with an incorrect home phone number.*
On the plus side, this incident has made me recall another day, long ago, when I was even dumber (believe it or not, har har). And since I've already twice exposed my stupidity to the world today, may as well go for it, huh? This will complete my stupidity hat trick. And it's kind of funny.
When I was probably 12 or 13 years old, I rode along with my mom to the post office. She handed me a bunch of letters, including several bills, and asked me to A.) Buy some stamps, and B.) Send the letters.
I did exactly as she asked. I went to the counter and bought some stamps. Then I dropped the letters in the mail slot. Mission accomplished, right?
Notice anything missing from that progression? Like, maybe, putting the stamps ON the letters? Yeah. Oops.
For some reason--maybe she realized she had a moron for a daughter--my mom saw fit to ask, when we were several blocks away, if I had completed the unspoken part of the mission. That's when the light bulb went on over my head. The story, believe it or not, has a somewhat happy ending: we managed to talk the postmaster into removing the letters from the mail slot and letting us stamp and re-mail them. Not without some difficulty and a great deal of embarrassment on my part, though.
And now I use that embarrassing, humiliating experience to make myself feel slightly better. Because although I double-queried an agency, at least the phone number in the letters was correct, and at least I put stamps on the envelopes.
Anyone care to join me in showcasing their sheer idiocy for the world? Come on...it's fun!
*And it wasn't a typo, either...I actually didn't know my home phone number. In my defense, it was a new-ish number, with easily transposed digits, and...oh, why bother. I'm stupid, okay? That's the problem here. I'm stupid.
If you don't feel that you are possibly on the edge of humiliating yourself, of losing control of the whole thing, then possibly what you are doing isn't very vital. If you don't feel like you are writing somewhat over your head, why do it? If you don't have some doubt of your authority to tell this story, then you are not trying to tell enough. --John Irving