Okay. So. Confession time.
This is really, really hard to admit, so I'm just gonna come right out and say it.
I haven't written a word of fiction since November.
Gah! I want to go run behind a chair or something, so ya'll can't see me.
I mean, yes, I worked on the revisions for Grim Light, and they were quite a task. 6000 words out, 10,000 words in. And that was like the third start-to-finish revision. And I was doing work-work, too--you know, the stuff they paid me for. But as for fiction...I fiddled with a few potential projects, brainstormed some, but I didn't actually sit down and just write.
This, after a four year streak of nothing but writing.
I don't know who or what to blame, aside from myself, who I blame a lot, of course. Was it because I had a job?* Was it because of other things in my life that were pulling at me? Was it because of NaNo? And if you go to that link, let me tell you--that was written the last day I wrote something non-revisional, on my NaNo project. And yes, I'm making words up, at least according to Firefox's spell check.
I recently went back to that project, the NaNo project, and re-read it. I have 35k words there. I want to finish it. There are some changes I need to make before I do, because I hated the direction it was going. It's the old pressure-cooker vs. crock pot analogy I used back then--some people plot better under pressure, but I'm a crock pot kinda writer. I need to just take it slow and let my brain do its thing. There's all kinds of stuff going on up there that I don't know about.
Let me state that it's NOT writer's block. I know writer's block. This isn't it. This is...I don't know. Confusion? Discouragement? Distraction? A combination of all three, maybe.
So today, I'm going to work on fixing those things. I'm going to get the manuscript all ready to be continued.
And later today, or maybe tomorrow--
I'm going to write. And I can't freaking wait.
Have you ever had a period of non-writing, be it writer's block or life? How long did it last? What did you do to stop it?
*I just recently took a leave of absence for a few months, due to both the writing thing and a few other factors that I can't discuss.
If you don't feel that you are possibly on the edge of humiliating yourself, of losing control of the whole thing, then possibly what you are doing isn't very vital. If you don't feel like you are writing somewhat over your head, why do it? If you don't have some doubt of your authority to tell this story, then you are not trying to tell enough. --John Irving