Why I Changed My Mind

Listening to: Kings of Convenience, "Power of Not Knowing"

Note: After I write this, I am fully prepared to go into hiding and save myself from the Evil Cabal of Evil Alter Egos, who are all going to KILL ME.

So, uh...I decided not to do NaNo.

Now wait, before you pile on...this is a decision made with much thought and consideration, and not a little regret. And I have pretty good reasons why it's just not for me, aside from last year's debacle (which actually turned out pretty well in the long run, at least I think, as I'm about to send the novel I messed up for NaNo last year out to CPs and I'm still pretty in love with it).

Let me put this out there: I love writing. I mean, duh. We know this.

And like a lot of writers, I get a lot out of the first-draft-period. That spectacular rush when the characters start becoming people, the euphoria when the story starts telling itself, the supreme satisfaction when everything just comes together. That feeling of being in the story, so deep inside it that it's all you can think of no matter what else you're doing. I love every second, and I revel in it. Sometimes I turn into a hyper little kid, when everything's going so well and the words are really flowing, and I bounce around in my seat and grin like an idiot and maybe dance around a bit.*

Now, let's talk about editing and revisions. I think I heard a few groans out there, seeping past the music playing on my headphones. I mean, at first when I'm revising, I'm kind of excited to fix all the things I know are wrong with the story, and there's the satisfaction of polishing my dirty, rough gem into, one hopes, a flawless diamond that will sparkle and shine and make people cry with its sheer beauty.

Ahem. Anyhow. That high wears off pretty quick, and then it's a long hard slog to the end.

So, as I've stumbled the last steps in the revision marathon these past few days, I've been thinking about all this and NaNo.

And I realized that NaNo compresses the part that I love, the part that turns me into a slightly tired ball of happiness and sunshine, and extends the part that turns me into a crotchety old lady who glares at little children and kicks puppies.** It takes away a month or two of writing and adds a month or two to editing.

As fun as the communal writing and the crazy rush to the end and the flurry of caffeine are, the writing itself is what really fulfills me. So why should I shorten that period (unless I'm on a deadline or something)? I should enjoy it. It goes fast enough as it is.

Now, a few things:

• In my preparation for NaNo this past week or so, I've done a great deal of brainstorming. Character profiles, worldbuilding, backstory creation, all that fun stuff. Far more than I've done for any previous novel. In the process, my throwaway idea has turned into something that really excites me. Funny how that happens, huh? I also feel very prepared to write it. I'm probably going to stop short of outlining the plot, because my brain just recoils at that idea. Maybe I'll try, who knows. But I've gotten something wonderful out of just this week of preparing for an event I won't even be participating in.

• I got my baby brother into NaNo's Young Writers Program. He's only ten, and he hasn't written much, so he's set a goal of 50 words/day. So even though I'm not really NaNoing myself, I'll be guiding a young soul through the process. And he's two years younger than when I wrote my first "novel", so I'll be helping one of my siblings beat the family record I set. And, you know, family bonding, sharing the love of writing, passing it on to the next generation, etc.
  

• I WILL be writing. I'm still pretty much on schedule to start the new project on Sunday. I'll probably go pretty fast as the rush of a new novel sets in and as all the words piling up in my head this past week finally tumble onto the page. I just won't be setting an arbitrary word count goal.
  

• The Husband, when I told him my reason for not NaNoing, said, "That's why I thought you shouldn't do it." I think he really just didn't want to deal with a wife who was pulling her hair out by the roots, screaming about tangled plot threads in the grocery store, or sitting in the corner muttering, "50,000 words, 50,000 words, 50,000 words." But whatever.
  

There you have it. Those are my reasons. I'll still be here on the sidelines, cheering all you brave folks on, encouraging you to OD on energy drinks, and laughing at the crazy. And everyone needs a cheerleader, right?

So, uh...please don't kill me?

*This may be more related to my innate dorkiness than my love of writing.

**Hyperbole alert. I don't do these things, even at the worst parts of revision. CALM DOWN, PEOPLE.

PIE! (and other things)

Listening to: KaiserCartel, "Favorite Song" (This song is so adorable & sweet, I recommend you give it a listen)


Here's the pie from last Thursday's Fall Bakeoff on Twitter. Apple with a crumb topping.


It was pretty good, but I'll do a few things differently next time. Thinking of making another one this week, and I'm going to get to the country market and get good apples. Grocery store produce is never as good as what that place offers. I have some Triple Berry preserves from there, and OMG is it the best thing on toast ever or WHAT.

Also, I don't think the recipe called for enough butter. The crumb topping could've stood to be...crumbier? I don't know. I'll try more butter next time, and we'll see where it goes.

So. In the "other things category...

Those of you who were around last year may remember the hellish time I had with NaNoWriMo. And how I decided afterward that it wasn't for me. I mean, sure, a few good things came from it...mostly blog posts. And I eventually finished my NaNovel, after some major plot restructuring. And I think it's halfway decent. Time will tell if others agree with me, but whatever.

So I mentioned on Twitter the other day that I saw everyone gearing up for NaNo, and now I had to resist the temptation--and then some of my buddies pounced on me, seeing a carcass ready for picking. "You know you want to!" "All the cool kids are doing it!" "Be optimistic!"

Gah! And then we started assigning evil alter egos to the instigators, who then told those of us who were on the fence that we, too, could have evil alter egos if we'd just do NaNo. And then someone assigned Maleficent to me, and she's like the most badass Disney bad guy ever, and Sleeping Beauty was the first Disney movie I ever loved.

I totally lost my first tooth while watching Maleficent be all evil.

Double gah! There was some grumbling about all the Disneyfication of our alter egos, and discussion of perhaps making them all literary characters (and if anyone has any evil literary characters in mind that they think will fit me, leave suggestions in the comments), but I'm sort of already in love with this one.

Okay, so I'm thinking about NaNo. It's just so tempting, what with the communal writing aspect, and using a word count spreadsheet, and getting that much writing done in thirty days, and then thinking about it helped me get some details for an idea that's just been a vague concept in my head for several months. And, you know, having an evil alter ego.

So I've already gotten something out of it.

And I'm going to be project-less in November anyhow, because I plan to give the latest WIP to the betas & CPs (oh hey betas & CPs, this is probably the first you've heard of this, I'll be in contact via email soon to discuss your availability).

Here's my tentative plan, then:

Do NaNo. Give myself permission to write badly, knowing that getting the words down on paper is the goal and editing will fix that. But watch out for plot problems. Because those can become a big tangle that is nearly impossible to fix, or at least harder than bad writing. At the first sign of bad plotting, slow it down or take a few days off to consider new directions. So, in this scenario, I would be doing NaNo very carefully, and with the option to bail if I think it's hurting my idea. It's hard enough to do a good idea justice, so I don't want to risk ruining it altogether.

I've got to admit, I'm excited, and this has urged my brain to really think about the new idea...which led to some serious brainstorming last night when I was trying to fall asleep. That's always a good sign.

So what about you? NaNo, or NOOOOONaNo? Who would your evil alter ego be? And do you like my pie?

Confessional

Okay. So. Confession time.

This is really, really hard to admit, so I'm just gonna come right out and say it.

*Braces self*.

I haven't written a word of fiction since November.

Gah! I want to go run behind a chair or something, so ya'll can't see me.

I mean, yes, I worked on the revisions for Grim Light, and they were quite a task. 6000 words out, 10,000 words in. And that was like the third start-to-finish revision. And I was doing work-work, too--you know, the stuff they paid me for. But as for fiction...I fiddled with a few potential projects, brainstormed some, but I didn't actually sit down and just write.

This, after a four year streak of nothing but writing.

I don't know who or what to blame, aside from myself, who I blame a lot, of course. Was it because I had a job?* Was it because of other things in my life that were pulling at me? Was it because of NaNo? And if you go to that link, let me tell you--that was written the last day I wrote something non-revisional, on my NaNo project. And yes, I'm making words up, at least according to Firefox's spell check.

I recently went back to that project, the NaNo project, and re-read it. I have 35k words there. I want to finish it. There are some changes I need to make before I do, because I hated the direction it was going. It's the old pressure-cooker vs. crock pot analogy I used back then--some people plot better under pressure, but I'm a crock pot kinda writer. I need to just take it slow and let my brain do its thing. There's all kinds of stuff going on up there that I don't know about.

Let me state that it's NOT writer's block. I know writer's block. This isn't it. This is...I don't know. Confusion? Discouragement? Distraction? A combination of all three, maybe.

So today, I'm going to work on fixing those things. I'm going to get the manuscript all ready to be continued.

And later today, or maybe tomorrow--

I'm going to write. And I can't freaking wait.

Have you ever had a period of non-writing, be it writer's block or life? How long did it last? What did you do to stop it?

*I just recently took a leave of absence for a few months, due to both the writing thing and a few other factors that I can't discuss.

All right, FINE.

All right. I'll come back.

I've been avoiding the blog recently because, well, I just didn't really feel like it. NaNo went south for me (and not in the good, "hey it's warmer down here" way, more like the "this book belongs in a basement somewhere, gathering dust and being eaten by rodents" kinda way). Yes, yes, I know, with NaNo, you're supposed to write badly, that's the point, blah blah blah.

It wasn't the writing itself that was bothering me. It was the plot. Dear lord, the plot. With such a short span of time in which to create it (I'm not an outliner, and never will be), I turned in desperation to overplayed cliches, done-to-death tropes, and plot twists that even a blind man could see coming from a mile away in a thick fog. As I told my husband, "I think I liked this novel better when Dean Koontz wrote it in 1995."*

Bad writing, I can fix. A hopelessly terrible plot...not so much. That would pretty much require scrapping 90% of the novel, and the very idea of putting in all that work only to do it all over again...bah.

My plotting process, such as it is, cannot be successfully completed in 30 days. I need at least six months. I don't know exactly how things work in the cobweb-strewn attic that is my brain, but when I let it do its thing, everything falls into place. If I give myself time to let my subconscious work, to put all the pieces into place without any real conscious effort on my part, then it does the job. Or at least, it makes a somewhat coherent plot structure that uses all the elements I tossed into the first 3/4 of the novel for just that sake. I can't necessarily say it's truly successful, since I remain, as I like to put it, gloriously unpublished.

Example: With Grim Light, a novel I was never sure I could complete from the very beginning, I reached a point of true despair about two days before I finished the book. I looked at everything I'd written so far and saw no way in which to resolve it all, no way for my heroine to get out alive. still truly human, and somewhat happy. No. Way. Whatsoever. So I set the book aside for a few days, struggling with the idea that it may not actually get finished. I didn't wrack my brain, didn't brainstorm--none of that. I just set it aside and brooded.

Then it happened. I sat back down to write, determined to give it my all, and finished the book in one night. I like to use the cooking metaphor: If I let everything simmer for a while on low heat, I get a (to me, at least) wonderful resolution with a few twists and turns that even I didn't see coming. But NaNo...NaNo is like broiling or microwaving. Everything happens very quickly, and there's no time for all the elements to coalesce into a delicious whole.

That's right, people. I'm a freaking Crock Pot.

Anyhow, so, that's that. I will eventually come back to that novel and try again, but it needs some time to sit by itself in the corner and think about what it's done. Then, when it's ready to apologize, maybe we'll talk.

In the meantime, I'm now in the editing and revision stages for Grim Light. Yesterday, I found a massive plot hole--okay, more like an epic failure of logic on my part--that I'm still trying to fix. As a whole, I feel the book will take more than one serious pass to get it to where I want it, but that's nothing new. I hope to be querying by April, though. I'm going to throw myself into this with everything I've got. Because I'm chomping at the bit to start on my next idea, which will be somewhat of a departure for me in terms of setting, theme, and voice. I'm projecting that this novel will take about two years from first page to final edit. It's going to be tricky, but I love the idea and I can't wait to get started.

In a future post, maybe even today, look for website and book recommendations for editing and revising. This should, I hope, be especially helpful to the first time NaNo-ers out there. I know one in particular that I promised this information to, and hopefully others will benefit from it as well.

Because that's what I'm here for, folks. Just here to help. And, you know, whine. It's a strange mixture.

*Don't get me wrong, I'm a big Koontz fan from way back. It's more the "1995" part that is the insult.

NaNoWriMo Quirks, or: Wherein Our Author Cracks Herself Up

One interesting effect of NaNo is the increase in the reviewing comments I make to myself as I'm writing. Since, for the most part, it's all going straight from my brain to the page in a big messy sprawl of words, and I have some serious OCD issues, I can't let some things go by without commenting on them. If I'm honest with myself, it's because I'm afraid I'll miss them when I'm revising. Some examples:

• One of my main characters didn't have a last name. For his first full-name mention, I just called him "Cameron Lastname." The comment linked to this says, "Um...yeah. He needs one." This got especially fun when his parents came on the scene, and it was "Mr. Lastname did this" and "Mrs. Lastname did that" left and right. Find and replace will be my savior on this one.
• A serious NaNoism (read: awful, typo-ridden sentence that you refuse to fix because doing so will decrease your word count): "Our toes, resting at an angle on the porch floot,* pushed back and forth to move the swing gently back and forth." I'll leave you to ponder the beauty of that sentence all on your own, but of course I had to leave a comment for myself, because obviously I might miss such a rotten sentence when editing...
  
• "She lifted the lid of my old jewelry box, setting off a tinkling rendition of Some Song That Would Play On A Jewelry Box." Really famous song, yo. Bet I've got it in your head now. Of course I had to point this out to myself.
  
• Next to a truly horrid metaphor, which I refuse to share because it's just. That. Bad.: "Dear lord. Really? REALLY?!"
  
• I kind of dropped a character for, oh, 50 pages or so, then brought her back out of nowhere. My narrator said, "With all the chaos swirling around my life, I'd completely forgotten about my tenuous alliance with What's-Her-Name." I said: "Or maybe the author completely forgot because she's been dropping plot threads left and right. Who knows. Could go either way."
  
• Couldn't find the word I was looking for, so just put in a word that I truly hate, "verve". Comment: "AGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH this is horrid."
  
• I unleashed the critic in me on one of my narrator's particularly heartbreaking statements: "Bah. Inane, trite crap."
  
• When my narrator was cooking breakfast: "Can you tell the author was hungry? Mmm...potatoes." It should be known that I promptly went to the kitchen and made myself some french fries.
  
• And finally, after I said one thing in three different ways in a single sentence: "Okay, think of about five more ways, because this doesn't slam it over the reader's head quite enough."

I think it goes without saying that the editing process for this particular novel should be nothing short of hilarious. Of course, I will say it, because NaNo has made me say everything that pops into my head, and I am one wordy girl.**

*Yes, that typo was in the original sentence--and yes, I left it there.
**This doesn't flow quite right, moron. Geez. Think of another noun you can call yourself. There must be more than one.

Just a question...

So, uh...could we change NaNoWriMo to NaNoWriTwo-Weeks-and-One-Day?

No? Okay. Just checking.

Back to work.

NaNo Status Update, Day 14: On Wordiness

Listening to: Rise Against, "Whereabouts Unknown"

So I'm 500 words behind on my NaNo. No worries, though--I'll catch up today, no problem. I'm actually excited to push past it.

Why, you ask? And how? How can you possibly be excited to write after vomiting out 1667 words each day (okay, and 3000 on that one day, after I missed the day before) for the past thirteen days?

Valid questions. I will get to them in the most roundabout fashion possible.

One of the interesting things about doing NaNo, especially for the first time, is studying the effects it has on your writing, both the process and the actual product. I talked about the strange effect it's had on my process, in my super-special, I've-had-too-much-caffeine way, last week. And last night I realized how it's affected my product.

Usually, when I really get into a novel, I start getting really excited about seeing what happens in the next scene, or about writing that scene, or about seeing the aftermath of that scene. I start imagining it in my mind, picturing it, savoring it. And I get the itch to write. Which is nice, since I don't have to force myself at all.

I've reached that point now. So I wrote yesterday, trying to reach the scene I wanted to reach, and it led me to an interesting revelation. Because I didn't get to that scene.

I wrote 1100 words. At the start, my MC and the object of her affections were in her car, driving to a particular destination. At the end of those 1100 words, they were still in the damn car. They'd driven maybe two miles.

Nothing. Had. Happened.

What had I written, then? A line of dialog or two, and lots o' pretty, pretty description. I even inserted a comment for a particular line, something to the effect of, "This is the purplest of purple prose." Yes, description has its place, and is necessary for clarity, scene-setting, and pacing (and sometimes symbolism and foreshadowing). But I realized that I'd become a word machine, simply churning out sentence after sentence of, essentially, nothing.

I have a natural wordiness--I have to strive for economy quite frequently. (See? Were those two words necessary? Not at all.)

So this is proof, I suppose, that NaNo is working in one respect--it's shut up the Inner Editor, bound and gagged him, and shoved him in the closet. He still gets a word in now and then, as with the purple prose comment,* but for the most part he's quiet. And I draw out my scenes with a bunch of crap about the pretty, pretty leaves, and the road, and the sun setting in the distance, and blah blah blah.** Most of which will probably be removed in January.***

Looking back, I can think of many places in this manuscript with superfluous description.

And this is why I'm excited to write today--because I will push past that scene and get to the one I'm itching to see. I have over 2000 words in which to do it. No, I won't let the inner editor out--he stays in the closet until 12:01 a.m. on December 1. I'll just...well, not sure how I'm going to do this without Inner Editor.

I guess I'll just have to write and find out.


*He shouted that one when I removed his gag to give him his daily bread and water.

**And the leaves are pretty, and the sun is pretty, but they're not the freakin' main characters, so maybe they shouldn't have more words devoted to them in one scene than I've devoted to my characters. Gah!

***Being a good girl and letting it sit for a month. Maybe longer, since I still have to edit Grim Light. Oh my, I have a lot of editing ahead...it makes my head hurt just thinking about it.

NaNo Status Update, Day 11

Hit 19k words tonight. I think I've lost my plot. Has anyone seen it? It's about yea high, not particularly bright, a bit clumsy, with a few half-hearted twists.

If seen, please call the number on its collar (1-800-MYPLOTSUX). I'd offer a reward, but...eh.

Seriously, though, I'm at that point. YOU know. That point. Where you kinda maybe sorta know what's happening next, but it's all vague and nebulous in your mind? And you think that maybe it's stupid? And you wonder why you're even doing it? Oh yes, and you start thinking that your narrator's voice is a little (read: a lot) uneven? And you kind of wish she'd just stop complaining? Yes, yes. You know. Well, I'm there, baby.

But the beauty of NaNo is that, instead of letting your Avoidance Troll guide you, you just have to step right on him (squish) and take the lead. No, no--don't listen to his muffled pleas as he squirms under your boot--he has no control over you. We are not operating under normal circumstances here, people. We've gone...NaNo.

I've also reached another milestone in this (insane, inane, ill-advised) endeavor. I dreamed about my book. Never done that before, until last night. That's right, after no less than four novels, one of them invaded my subconscious and made things very interesting while I slept. Probably, I assume, because I spend so much time thinking about it during the daylight hours. So now I don't even get a break when I'm sleeping. Dammit.

And this was one of those dreams that woke me up in a cold sweat. My character--I have new sympathy for her. I haven't really been very nice to her, but it's for her own good. And as I promised on twitter last night, I will bake cookies for her when this is all over.

Oh, speaking of cookies...I can't stop eating. Pretty much ever since NaNo started. If I see it, I eat it. So, even if I don't finish my book, I'll have twenty new pounds to show off, come December 1. Um...yay?

Speaking of which, I think I have some Doritos upstairs...better get on that.

Keep writing, everybody!

P.S. Came up with a nice idea for a post-NaNo celebration post today, which I will be working on throughout the month. Keep an eye on this space come early December.

NaNoWriMo Top Five

Listening to: The Flobots, "Handlebars"...again. Really like this song.

Top Five Reasons Why I Will Never Do NaNo Again

1. After one week--seven days, yo--and 14k words...my brain, it is dead. The funeral is tomorrow. In lieu of flowers, please send donations to The Society for People Who Join Ridiculous Writing Endeavors.
2. I can no longer speak coherently. I frequently say one word when I mean another. For instance, last night I tried to tell someone I was a doormat, and accidentally called myself a welcome mat.
   
3. My story? I have no idea where it's going. Usually, when I get to this point, I can spend a few days away from it and let things work themselves out in my head. But noooo...I have to be doing NaNo, which requires me to force it all out as I write. I don't like this. I don't like this at all.
4. I find myself trying to plan for NaNo in the midst of long-planned social engagements. Like, "Okay, so I'm going to Pittsburgh with Keely on Thursday...I wonder if she would mind driving at least one way, so I can write." This somewhat defeats the purpose of planning social engagements--you know, the things I do to get away from the keyboard.
5. I am no longer capable of typing a single word without a type.* I used to be such a great typist, and such a good speller. All gone now. Thanks, NaNo!

Top Five Reasons Why I Will Be Starting Another 50,000 Words on November 1, 2009

1. The typos? They rawk. They make me laugh. Hey, if I can get some comedic relief from something, I'm all over it. No matter how many brain cells it destroys.
2. The more I write, the more I want to write. Not just my NaNovel, either. Blogging, journaling, even twitter. I am a fountain of words. Most of them may suck, but hey. That's the price.
   
3. It's a lot less lonely than writing by myself.
   
4. I have a short memory. I'll probably forget the hellishness by...oh, December 2.
   
5. 14,000 words? In one week? Awesome!

*This was totally unintentional, I swear. I didn't even notice it until I finished and was reviewing what I'd written. I'm leaving it in for its awesomeness.

Inner Editor vs. Inner Word Count Monitor

Listening to: The Flobots, "Handlebars"

Come one, come all, to the battle of the century: The Inner Editor vs. the Inner Word Count Monitor DEATHMATCH, sponsored by Mountain Dew and NaNoWriMo! You'll pay for the whole seat, but you'll only need THE EDGE!

In this corner, the Inner Editor, a heavyweight prizefighter with wire-rimmed glasses and a red pen. (Crowd Roars) He's feisty, he's pedantic, he's nitpicky--and he won't shut up!

Aaaaand in this corner, making his first professional appearance, the Inner Word Count Monitor! He has control of your mouse, and he will make you hit the "Word Count" button every twenty seconds! And he'll slap you with a trout for checking Twitter! (Crowd throws manuscript pages at the ring)

REF: All right boys, you know the rules. No hitting below the belt, no jabbing with pens, and no tripping. I'm looking at you, Word Count Monitor.

3...2...1 DIIIING!

ANNOUNCERS: Editor comes out of his corner, fists flying through the air, ready for action. Word Count Monitor hangs out in his corner, chewing gum and smirking. Editor does some fancy footwork, jabs, fakes an uppercut, then comes in fast, attempting a powerful hit to the gut with a hardback first edition of Elements of Style. Word Count Monitor blocks the blow with one finger.

And Word Count Monitor finally saunters from his corner.

What's that he's pulling from his shorts, Bob?

Well, Joe, I believe it's a NaNoWriMo Word Count Spreadsheet. Look at that thing. It has a morale chart and everything. Oooh, and he smacks Editor across the face with it! Editor is DOWN! No one saw this coming, Bob. The crowd goes wild!

Word Count Monitor is throwing his hands in the air and dancing to the crowd's cheers--I do believe this celebration is a bit premature. And there's Editor, leaping off the mat and throwing himself at Word Count Monitor! Oooh, he's punched Word Count Monitor in the back with a grammar website! That's a low blow, wouldn't you say, Bob?

Yes it is, Joe, but it's no less than we've come to expect from Editor. Look at that squiggly red line across Word Count Monitor's back. That was a good hit from Editor.

And Word Count Monitor turns with a powerful swing with a trackball mouse. Oh NO! He hit the "Word Count" button! Things aren't looking good for Editor.

Editor is down, crying like a little girl. The ref is counting it...one, two, three!

WORD COUNT MONITOR WINS! WORD COUNT MONITOR WINS! He's dancing around the ring, and look! He just jumped on Editor like a trampoline! Nobody expected this, Bob. Editor is a veteran of four novels, two crappy and two not-so-bad, and everyone thought he had what it takes to beat a newcomer like Word Count Monitor. But the scrappy underdog has come from behind for an unexpected victory.

Well, Joe, Editor was the clear favorite in this contest. I bet a lot of people lost money on this one.

They sure did, Bob. They sure did.

NaNo Status Update, Day 3

Skipped my lunch break because Bill Clinton was flying into the airport, and I wanted to catch a glimpse.

I saw his shoes.

Not really worth it, but okay. Then I spent a few hours knocking on doors, canvassing for a local candidate. Got a bunch of yeses...pretty sure someone gave us his Christmas card list by accident.

Now, it's 8:45, and I need to get my writing done for tomorrow because I'm skipping lunch again and doing more political stuff...and also partying. Hey, this only comes once every four years. But still, gah! Excited for this election to be over...both to find out the result, and to be able to concentrate on NaNo.

Off to work.

NaNo Status Update #1

So, I hit my word count target.

For tomorrow.

How hard do I rock?

The answer, for those who don't know, would be "pretty hard".

This is good, for more than the obvious reasons. I'm doing election stuff tomorrow after work, and then election stuff and election results party stuff on Tuesday after work. That pretty much leaves me with lunch breaks and a few hours tomorrow night for writing, until Wednesday. I needed a cushion, and I got one.

Now, off for some much need sleep. Brain=very fuzzy. Hands=tired.

But heart? Heart=happy.

Na-WTF-Was-I-Thinking-Mo

Listening to: Say Anything "Alive With the Glory of Love"

So NaNoWriMo has begun.

Could someone, please, just do me this favor. Answer a single question for me:

What the hell did I get myself into?

In all seriousness, my first day went well, although it got off to a rocky start. I couldn't start at midnight on November 1, as I wanted, because we were throwing a Halloween party. Writing is important to me, NaNo is important to me, but when my guests need drinks, they need drinks, yo. And no one else is going to make them!* Plus, the Naked Pirate drink my brother introduced me to was quite popular that night, and no one else quite knows how to make it.**

So I got started Saturday afternoon. Of course, before I began, I had to do the following:

• Spill coffee on my laptop. Just on the edge, but it slipped into a vent and into my headphone and line-in jacks, leaving me with some sound problems and a laptop that needed to be dried out before I could use it.
  
• Decide to handwrite for the first day.
  
• Find a notebook that has more than three consecutive blank pages.
  
• Search desperately for my pink bandana. This, by the way, is my ritual for NaNo this year. I must wear a pink bandana whenever I write. I have my reasons for it. It should be interesting when I'm writing on my lunch break at work--I'm quite sure the guys won't really understand, and will think I'm weird. Which, you know, might just be true. But still.
  
• Be unable to find bandana for ten minutes, and start to wonder if the universe really doesn't want me to write. At all. Ever.
  
• Find pink bandana, and finally commence writing.
  

I hit the target (1667 words), handwriting about half of it and then typing it all up and adding another scene later that night. I'd like to actually be at least a few hundred words over my daily goal today and tomorrow, so that I have a cushion built in for Election Day. I'm going to vote, go to work, possibly canvas or give people rides to the polls, and then party while the results roll in--none of that, except maybe my lunch break, leaves me time for writing. We'll see, though. It was a struggle getting more than 1600 last night.

Later, a post on the eternal struggle between my Inner Editor and my Inner Word Count Monitor. NaNo seems to bring out the worst in both these guys.

But now...I write!

Happy NaNo-ing!

*Some of my friends call me Martha Stewart Jr. This is only because, in comparison with them, I am fairly domestic. I have a house and a flower garden and a vegetable garden, I like playing hostess and making food for people, etc. In comparison with Martha Stewart herself, though, I am a bum on the street, drinking hooch from a paper bag and politely offering sips to passersby.

**Ice, about 1 part gin, 3 parts pineapple juice, and a splash of blue curacao or Blue Maui--just enough to give it a pretty blue-green shade. So. Yummy. And dangerous.

P.S. Currently at my mom's house, babysitting the sibs. Wearing my bandana as a headband over my disheveled hair. Spilled coffee all down my white t-shirt on my way here. Went to bed late and got up early, so the eyes look a little tired. I look like a writer, at least--you know, the kind that's been drinking for a week straight and maybe hasn't sold anything for a while and so must couch-surf. But a writer nonetheless.

Misnomers

I really, really wish my husband would stop, when telling people of my NaNo plans, getting it confused with a certain organization whose acronym begins with N and ends with A and mainly consists of perverted grown men.

And telling them I'm "getting my friends to do it, too."

Just sayin'.

NaNooooooo...

So, yeah. As I'm sure I mentioned previously, I'm doing NaNoWriMo again this year. Last year I died off right around day two. Hey, on days three and four, I was moving from one state back to another...I was a little busy, okay?

This year, however, my motto is "No Excuses."* Nothing is gonna stop me from winning this year. I have a great, fun little novel all lined up. I have multiple friends in the area who are joining me for the 30 Days of Crazy. I'm only working part time. And I'm not moving. From the keyboard. Until 12:01 on December 1.

I'm nervous as hell, though. Excited, yes. Itching to write, yes. Thrilled to have friends participating, yes. Nervous? BIG FAT YES. I mean, 50k in 30 days? Really? Are they kidding? I can't do that! It took me eight months (give or take a few, what with the indecision and other books I was working on) to write my last novel! And that clocked in at about 60k!

But then the little voice kicks in--the one I rarely listen to, because it's so quiet and tinny, sounds like it's coming from the other end of a long tunnel--and it says, "You can do this. The pressure will be good for you. The deadline will be good for you. And it'll be fun as hell."

You think I should listen? Yeah. I think I should listen.

FIVE DAYS, PEOPLE!


*I think that was also the motto of a jeans company at some point in time. Really, what kind of tagline is that for denim wear? "There is no excuse for why your butt looks big in these jeans." "There is no excuse for our refusal to size jeans like men's pants, so that you don't spend three hours just trying to find a pair that fits." No excuses, indeed.

Updates

Someone's actually updating her blog two days in a row. It's a freakin' miracle.

Just finished emailing Tia about our beta-reading arrangements--she finished Starcaster, and I'll be finishing my current masterpiece (she said with a hint of sarcasm)* within a month. I love how we're practically on the same schedule! I also heart my beta readers, especially Tia, who's always so insightful and eager to help. Thank God for the Internet--without it, we'd never have met!

So, here's where I'm at after this long-but-it-felt-short, crazy-and-it-felt-crazy summer...

• I'm working part time now, as I said yesterday. Sort of. They keep pulling me in on my days off, but I don't mind so much. I like my job, I like the guys I work with (yes, it's all guys--practically the story of my life), and I like my projects. Tech writing is never the most fulfilling occupation,** but the guys make it fun.
  
  
• I finally settled on a book idea for the long haul. I'm about 45k words in, with probably 15-20k more to go. I hope to have it finished by November 1, so I can participate in NaNo with one of the other ideas I came up with in that frenzy of creativity last winter. After that, I have yet another idea lined up, in addition to all the editing and submitting of the other two. I know how to keep busy, that's for sure. Or make myself crazy. One of the two.
  
  
• And another reason to finish my current project soon...I've decided to submit it to the Golden Hearts. I think it fits the description, although I'm torn between paranormal romance and YA romance. I'll probably go with paranormal, though. Fingers crossed, everybody! I'd be happy just to make it into the top 100--the GHs are so big and well known in the industry, that's a major accomplishment in itself...and certainly a nice addition to my query letter.
  
  
• Whenever I actually have time, I'll load up some of the pictures from this crazy, crazy summer. It's been quite a time, between visitors and festivals and parties. I think we overcompensated for last summer's loneliness and boredom this year. I don't think we were bored or lonely once. And I'm not complaining!

That's about it. Boy, it doesn't seem like so much when it's displayed in such an organized fashion...but trust me. It's been...a lot. And here's to more!



*I had a professor in college who frequently added parenthetical dialog tags to his own speech, just like that. After I graduated, that little quirk, oddly enough, was one of the things I missed the most!

**You can always tell I'm back at the tech writing by all the bulletted lists in my blog posts.

Let it Freakin' Snow.

Listening to: The New Amsterdams, "Story Like a Scar"

Winter continues here in Pennsylvania. I woke up to a yard covered in white and dark green splotches, since the blanket of snow is not yet complete. I feel like I went straight from summer to winter--it was 65 degrees when I left Virginia last weekend. Very disconcerting.

Anyhow, I'm totally freaking blocked when it comes to NaNo. I tried, I really did. I'm not sure if it's the pressure and the realization that each day I fell behind set me back massively, or the moving back to my home state, or if I just need a damn break from writing for a few weeks. Maybe a combination of all of the above. Also, I feel like I'm a bit in limbo, because I want to run through my last novel one more time, but I promised myself I wouldn't until December. I still need a little more distance.

I think I'm going to work on some side projects for the next few weeks. Maybe I'll scrawl out a few short stories (this contest sounds fun, I might do it just for kicks) and work on the Super Extra Top Sekrit project that's been floating about my mind for a while. No novels for at least a few weeks. No projects that are huge and far-reaching, that will take up the next six to eight months of my life. Just smaller-scope things that I always put aside in favor of the big stuff.

There. I feel much better now. I may have failed NaNo (it's only the second week, but let's face facts--I'm like 10,000 words behind at this point), but I'm giving myself to work on the stuff I always put off.

After all, as I've been saying in regards to NaNo for the past two years...there's always next year. And hey--at least I tried this year! Making progress, I'd say.

Now if only the snow would stop, I'd feel freakin' spectacular.

Everything BUT writing

Listening to: Weezer, "Pink Triangle"

Cleaning. Packing. Then more cleaning...and more cleaning...and some more packing.

Haven't really written a word since my last post. Doing NaNo the same month we move back to PA turned out to be...um...not a great idea. I won't let myself stress over it, though--if I don't make it all the way, there's always next year!

Driving back to PA tomorrow. Then cleaning and UNpacking there, and hopefully writing. Will probably be back to blogging on Monday--Tuesday at the latest.

And so it begins...

1,147 down.

48,853 to go.

Sleep now.

Next Stop, Crazytown

Listening to: Lagwagon, "Automatic"

Finished my first pass of revisions yesterday! It was a long slog to the end, but I managed. I wanted one day of sanity--or at least, non-writing-related insanity--before the big start.

That's right, NaNoWriMo starts at midnight tonight! Actually, it's already started for nine time zones. At 12:01 a.m tomorrow, I expect to be in front of the computer, pounding away at the keyboard. My word count might move slowly for this first week, since I'll be dealing with all the moving stuff, too. That's right, we're 99% sure that we're getting the hell outta this state on Saturday. I don't want to say 100%, as that may tempt the fates...and TH's company.

Short post today, as I have a long list of chores to do so I can squeeze in some writing time tomorrow. I'll be joined in the insanity by my friend Todd back in PA, and my friend Nancy in Wisconsin, and 80,000 other fools. Maybe more--I haven't seen an official count on the NaNo page yet. I just hope we all come out the other side sane and well.

And 50,000 words richer, of course.

'Til tomorrow!